


Remember Me

by notanannoyingfangirl



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-05
Updated: 2015-08-05
Packaged: 2018-04-13 03:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4505718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notanannoyingfangirl/pseuds/notanannoyingfangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Teens Dan Howell and Phil Lester made a pact to get married when Phil turned thirty, if they were both still single, not long before they lost touch for good. Today is Phil Lester’s birthday, and all he really wants to do it get back in touch with his old friend</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remember Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [auroraphilealis (xrosepetalsx)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/xrosepetalsx/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I am not claiming that this is real etc. ect.
> 
> A/N: Even though it’s not technically ‘til tomorrow, this is an early birthday present for my friend theinsanityplays (Happy birthday Eliza!!!!) I hope you enjoy :)

Phil stared at the address written on the slip of paper in his hand. Was he really going to do this? It was stupid, he probably wasn't even single anymore - if he remembered the deal at all. After all, it had been twelve years. A lot has changed over twelve years.

Phil had a job, an apartment, had moved to London after attending the University of Manchester. Somewhere along all of that, the two of them had lost touch.

Dan Howell.

For a year the two of them had been inseparable, the best of friends. Then Phil had graduated high school while Dan was only starting year ten. They had kept in touch for a while through phone calls and video chats but it wasn't the same. After a while the phone calls faded away.

Phil hadn't seen Dan Howell since he was eighteen years old. Now it was his thirtieth birthday, and for some reason Dan Howell was the only person he wanted to see.

No - there was a real reason. It wasn't just a spontaneous decision on Phil's part.

\--

_"You think we'll be friends forever?" Dan asked, from where he was laid out on the air mattress next to Phil's bed._

_"Of course we will," Phil said, his voice had been so sure, "and in a couple years you can come up to Manchester University too." Phil propped himself up so that he could look down and meet Dan's gaze._

_"It's just.. you're my best friend, and I don't know how I'm going to go so long without seeing you," Dan said quietly, playing with a loose thread on the blanket. His voice sounded like it cracked, Phil hoped he didn't cry. If Dan started crying, then Phil was sure he would too._

_"Hey we can call and video chat, it's not the end of the world," Phil said, slipping off his bed so that he was lying on the air mattress next to Dan._

_"Yeah, I guess," Dan sniffled, curling up next to Phil. "But what if you meet someone cooler than me? Or start dating? What if you forget all about me?"_

_"Not possible," Phil said, shaking his head. There was no way either of those things would happen. After all, he could never forget about the boy he loved. Not that he would tell Dan that. It would either make things incredibly awkward if Dan didn't return his feelings or make leaving ten times harder if he did._

_Dan didn't look all that reassured, but he didn't say anything._

_"If anything, I have to worry about you replacing me," Phil joked._

_"Not possible," Dan said quietly, mirroring Phil's words._

_"Tell you what," Phil said quietly, running on of his hands through Dan's hair, "if by the time we turn thirty, neither of us is in a serious relationship then we have to marry each other. Now we can't lose touch."_

_"You turn thirty or I turn thirty?" Dan asked, but he was smiling now._

_"I turn thirty."_

_"Deal," Dan said with a grin. "Now you're stuck with me."_

\--

Phil hadn't seen Dan in nearly twelve years. He couldn't exactly show up out of the blue and say 'hey remember when we were kids and you promised to marry me if I was still single when I turned thirty?' because that would be kind of creepy. Except he didn't have a better plan.

He'd gotten Dan's address from Chris, who Phil had only gotten back in touch when he went to visit his family for Christmas. It turned out that Dan and his family had moved back to Reading not long after Phil left for college, so it wasn't like they could see each other for holidays or anything.

But what were the odds that they had both ended up moving to London? It was a big city, of course, and they had both always talked about it.... but...

Phil was stupid to think it was anything more than that, they had barely been friends for over a year. Sure, they were close, but they never dated (even though Phil wished they had). It wasn't like the universe or fate or destiny bringing them back together. No, it was Phil being an idiot. But he was newly thirty and seemingly permanently single and desperate for any piece of his past he could clutch onto.

At least that was his excuse.

\--

Phil raised his hand to knock, then paused before he could actually touch the wooden door. He had debated with himself on the whole train ride here, if he should actually go through with his stupid plan.

But what did he have to lose? Even if Dan was already in a relationship or something, then at least he would have gotten back in touch with an old friend.

He knocked on the door.

\--

Dan was staring at his calendar. For some reason the date seemed important, familiar. But it wasn't a holiday, or his mum's birthday (or his birthday, or his brother's birthday, or.. anything really).

Shrugging to himself, Dan turned back into the kitchen to put his (now empty) bowl of lucky charms into the sink.

It was another day of.. nothing, frankly. He didn't have any plans, and while he could upload or film a video for his YouTube channel, he didn't particularly feel like it. The flat was too quiet, like it always was, and today felt different.

Today felt important.

It wasn't until he checked his email that he remembered why. Because there is was, in bold letters. A Facebook notification, of all things. Normally he deleted them without even opening them. But this one.. this one made him pause.

**Today is Phil Lester's birthday**

Of course. Phil's thirtieth birthday, that's why today felt different. A part of Dan wondered if Phil remembered that deal that they had made, when they were young and stupid and so in love even if neither of them ever mentioned it. Before they knew who they were. The same part wondered if Phil was dating someone, or married, and if the deal would have been void anyway.

He hadn't really thought about Phil in ages, not since the Facebook friend request oh so many years ago. Half tempted to go creep on Phil's page (merely to check out his relationship status), Dan opened a new tab.

However, before he could get any further than logging in, a knock on the door interrupted his inner musings on whether or not Phil had aged well. (He probably had, Dan decided as he stood to see what the postman was delivering now. Honestly he was lucky that his flat was on the ground floor so that he didn't have to walk fifty miles of stairs every morning to get his packages.)

\--

_Dan twisted his hands together, trying not to cry. "Phil- I... I want to tell you something," he said, his voice cracking. He had only known the older boy for a couple of months but he'd never.. connected with anyone the way that he had with Phil._

_Phil looked over, his blue eyes wide with worry. They were sitting on the swing set in their local park. "Dan, what's wrong?" His voice was soft, caring, and it made Dan want to cry even harder. What would Phil think of him when he said..._

_"I think I'm bisexual," he blurted, before clutching his hands over his mouth._

_Phil's worried expression shifted into the smile that Dan loved so much, "I thought you were going to say you killed someone," he said as he stood and knelt in front of the swing Dan was sitting on. "Can I tell you a secret?"_

_Dan nodded slowly, watching his friend carefully._

_"I am too," Phil whispered, before drawing Dan into a hug, "and it's nothing to be ashamed of."_

_Dan's other confession could wait, he supposed, as he buried his face in Phil's shoulder._

\--

Phil didn't recognize the face that opened the door. Except he did. Because while it was alien, it was achingly familiar. Because the little boy he had known was all grown up.

Dan's mouth was forming a circle, like he was going to say something, but then he closed it. He closed his eyes, then opened them, and Phil wondered if Dan thought he was dreaming.

" _Phil_?" Dan finally asked, as if he couldn't get any words out.

Phil shifted uncomfortably, he hadn't really thought this far ahead. And Dan was even cuter than he remembered with his brown hair and chocolate eyes and a dimple and... and... and then they were hugging. And Dan was taller than Phil was now, and it felt wrong because Dan had always been the smaller of the two.

"It's good to see you," Phil finally settled for, when they pulled away and Dan was still looking at him like he was a ghost.

"What are you doing here?" Dan asked, as if they both didn't remember the importance of this particular day.

"Can't I visit an old friend without any ulterior motives?" Phil asked innocently.

"Yes," Dan responded with a laugh, "would you like to come inside, Phil Lester?"

"I'd love to."

\--

Dan had almost died of shock when he opened his door to reveal Phil Lester, almost as if his thoughts had summoned him. He looked good, perhaps better than Dan had imagined.

Still, it was weird to think that Phil Lester was walking through his flat.

"How have you been?" Phil asked as he followed Dan into the lounge, as if it wasn't the lamest thing he could have possibly said.

Dan bit his tongue to keep the sarcastic comment about not wanting to cover twelve years worth of drama to himself, he didn't know if Phil would find it particularly funny. "I've been good," he settled for. "I'm lucky that YouTube took off the way that it did."

Phil nodded, "Chris told me about that." Ah, Chris Kendell, so that was how Phil had gotten his address.

"And how have you been, Phil Lester?" Dan asked, studying the boy he had once known so well.

"Good, I guess," Phil replied with a shrug.

"Oh, and happy birthday," Dan added quickly. "It's your thirtieth, right?" He already knew damn well just how old Phil was, but the blush spreading across the older boy's face was worth playing dumb.

"Yeah," Phil said quietly, suddenly becoming quite interested in the floor.

They both knew why he was here.

\--

Dan had offered to make tea, which Phil had accepted. Maybe a little Earl Grey would help calm his nerves. Now that he was actually here, with Dan Howell actually standing in front of him, Phil wasn't sure what to say. He hadn't exactly planned what he was going to say, half of him had expected Dan to slam the door in his face.

Wrapping his hands around the warm mug, Phil studied Dan carefully. Chewing on his lip, Phil couldn't help but blurt out "Why did you even let me in? If I were you, I would have slammed the door in my face."

Dan smiled, though Phil couldn't tell if it was from amusement or whether it was bitter. It shocked him to realize that he was no longer fluent in the many faces and emotions of Dan Howell. "Why would I do that?" He asked, and Phil was glad to detect a teasing tone to his voice, "when we have so much to catch up on?"

Phil let himself to smile - just slightly. "I suppose we do," he allowed.

\--

_"You're ridiculous," Dan said with a laugh, pushing Phil's shoulder._

_"What?" Phil asked, his tongue poking out from the corner of his mouth as he smiled. Dan really hated when he did that, because it was so fucking cute and it wasn't fair._

_Dan shook his head, then laughed again when Phil tripped and nearly stumbled off the edge of the pavement._

_"Need help walking?" Dan asked slowly, sarcasm practically dripping from his voice._

_"I guess I do," Phil said with a shrug, then he reached over and wrapped his arm around Dan's shoulders, "I guess you have to help me then."_

_"What a shame," Dan said with a laugh, but his cheeks were burning scarlet._

\--

It wasn't until they'd been talking for a handful of hours (where the fuck had Dan's morning went?) that one of them brought up  _the subject_. Until that point they had been catching up on everything they had missed in the years since they had seen each other.

"So," Dan asked casually, "are you seeing anyone?"

"No, actually," Phil stammered, his face betraying him and turning a violent shade of red. "Are you, are you seeing anyone?"

"Nope," Dan said slowly, popping the 'p'.

"That's surprising," Phil admitted, "somebody like you, I would have thought you'd have people jumping all over you."

"Oh, I do," Dan said with a laugh, "but I'm terribly afraid that I gave my heart away a long time ago."

"Oh," Phil said softly (sadly?).

"It's a shame that they never really knew how I felt though," Dan continued casually - too casually.

"Are you sure that they didn't?" Phil asked, and Dan thought he looked like he was finally grasping just who Dan was talking about.

"Well they never said anything, and then we lost touch so I guess I'll never really know," Dan said, "but we did make a promise that if we were both single when he turned thirty that we had to get married, I wonder if he'll make good on his promise."

Phil stood up, kneeling in front of Dan's chair. "Dan Howell, I have loved you since I was eighteen. I know that it was a stupid promise we made as teenagers, but I'm going to ask anyway. Daniel Howell, will you marry me?"

"Not until you take me on a date, you spoon," Dan said with a laugh, but he was already grabbing Phil's shirt to pull him up to meet his lips.

\--

_The library was empty except for that one kid, the black haired, blue eyed boy.. Dan glanced around, he could sit anywhere. But he was lonely, and that other kid looked lonely, and it was the first day of school. Nobody should be lonely on their first day of school, Dan decided, as he moved to sit next to the boy._

_Besides, maybe he'd actually make a friend._


End file.
